Tuesday, March 02, 2010

From Jesus Christ of Yahweh--The Latest Emails!

From Jesus Christ of Yahweh
date: Mon, Mar 1, 2010 at 8:44 PM
subject: Emergency

Dear Deacon Tim:

Being this is an emergency, I read your email.  You say you are waiting on My Instructions to help the Emergency Elect.  Is this true?  If your offer is true, send your response via email as soon as possible.  I do know how people are and thanks.  Did you explain the news source you suggested is a liberal news source?  Are you certain about this?  I have to go.

Love,

Isa al-Masih de Allah
also, Jesus Christ of Yahweh

P.S. Thanks for your email.
**********************************************************************
 From: Deacon Tim
Tue, Mar 2, 2010 at 8:07 AM
Subject: RE: Emergency

My Lord Jesus Christ of Yahweh:

Please send instructions a soon as possible on helping the Emergency Elect. It's an Emergency, after all.

Yes, this news source is liberal. I wouldn't even call it liberal. It's Marxist. I basically have the following rating system for news sources:

Fox--Thy Word is Truth. it's pretty obvious that these people love you, They will liquefy all liberals at the first order from you.

CBS-Liberal

ABC-Liberal

CNN-Liberal

MSNBC-Marxist. They are run by the Obama Clan from Kenya who has installed their half-breed Communist in the WHITE House. But you know that on account of you're being the Son of God and all.

NBC-Gay.

PBS- Seriously gay.

I don't really pay any attention to the news. I just read the Bible and listen to James Dobson and Rush. Sometimes Glenn Beck but he's a Mormon and they've got their own Bible and aren't really born again.

Anyway, have a great day. Say hello to your Mom for me.

Deacon Tim

2 comments:

Kevin said...

If he follows up with your crazy avatar here, then he will be asking for money. I think this gives you a chance to rant on liberal/conservative stereotypes more than on religious!

Deacon Tim said...

Rant? Stereotypes? Moi?