Usually I get emails from politicos who want me to give them money so they can keep saying stupid things instead of actually governing or getting a real job. But this time I have one from Jesus. I guess he's following me on Twitter. I'm famous and you're not.
date Sat, Feb 20, 2010 at 12:25 PM
subject NOTICE, EMERGENCY FROM JESUS CHRIST OF YAHWEH
Official Emergency Message
Government of Abraham
de Isa al-Masih de Allah
Jesus Christ Re-arrives!!
The purpose of this message is to explain Jesus Christ of God Yahweh and The Holy Spirit are now here on Earth. Mankind was given two-thousand years to prepare for this moment and now it's your turn to explain what you and your people prepared. Jesus Christ and The Holy Spirit have done Their Part; Jesus Christ and The Holy Spirit are here.
If you or your church prepared for Us, email Us at firstname.lastname@example.org or email@example.com or firstname.lastname@example.org with whatever you prepared.
If your church did not prepare for Us despite having more than two-thousand years to prepare, contact your superiors to see if they prepared for Us.
1. Our Press must be authorized.
2. No impromtu meetings nor impromtu interactions with Jesus.
3. No photos, etc.
4. Questions in "yes or no" format only.
This Message is an Official Message for the Government of Abraham founded in part by Jesus Christ of Yahweh. Any interference with This Message, The Originator, His Respondents, His Adherents, Our Mechanisms, etc. are subject to no appellate authority.
To stop receiving these emails please unsubscribe.
Government of Abraham P.O. Box 701 San Mateo, CA 94401 USA +1(650) 520-2317 www.twsj.tel